By naming “Fiancé abuse” Sikh Family Center brings necessary attention to the various problematic behaviors that appear after a rokaa/ardaas/engagement and before a wedding–often during a “courtship”–and may signal even greater risk after a wedding.
In creating the following list, victims and survivors of domestic violence from within our Sikh Punjabi community have identified signs and red flags that they now believe were present prior to the wedding but were overlooked or missed when they had first appeared.
Trust your gut. If something feels wrong, don’t hesitate to reach out to discuss your concerns. You are not alone. Confidential, non-judgmental support, for yourself or a friend, is available; you may call our Helpline and speak with a trained peer counselor in Punjabi or English. Everyone has a right to safety.